Lesson #57 of Motherhood: Take time for YOU.

“This post is part of a social shopper marketing insight campaign with Pollinate Media Group® and EDWARDS®, but all my opinions are my own. #pmedia #EdwardsPies http://my-disclosur.es/OBsstV”

The day that I became a mom, my entire life changed.

I think that most mothers out there would agree with me and say that exact same statement.

You think about what your life was like prior to children. You try to recall the days of college living, sleeping in until noon on the weekends, driving aimlessly around, and doing things out of what you want instead of what another person needs. Your days looked much different than they do today---days of lying around the house and watching Law & Order SUV marathons. Days of going to the spa, getting your hair done, and actually having nails that are manicured. Days dedicated to you and what pleases you.

You take the time, you take care of yourself, and you most definitely put yourself first.

So when does that change when you become a mother? I guess the better question is why does that change when we become moms.

I always wondered about that--- when I read about how moms didn’t even have time to shower or brush their teeth, or how they haven’t shopped for new clothes for themselves in years, or that they had to give up something they loved because they no longer had the time for it. The common theme that I noticed was that time was always brought up. It wasn’t because the desire was no longer there {although, that seemed to be the case in some situations}, but rather that they couldn’t quite figure out how to do it all without sacrificing their role as a mother. When it came down to it, the kids always came first.

I understand that. I do. That was my thought process with my first as well. I remember not wanting to miss a single moment with the kids. I remember feeling guilty if I slept more than two hours on the weekend after working a night shift. I remember being so exhausted, needing the time to myself, and yet I would still sacrifice my health {physical and mental}. I remember that I wouldn’t allow myself to have even 30 minutes of TV time to myself because that would take away from the kids. Or that my rule was to never blog or to have the computer or phone out because gosh darn it I should be on the floor with the kids at all times. Me? Me was second, third, or last, but it certainly wasn’t at the top of the priority list.

As time went by, that slowly began to change. Perhaps, I should say, as we expanded our family, or entire viewpoint of parenting began to change. The foundation was still there, but we realized we had unrealistic expectations for ourselves and we were not being completely true to who we were. We love to lounge. We love to let the kids run free without being there every second of every day. And we love to also take care of ourselves. Yes, our children and their needs will always be important, and yes, they will always trump our wants, but when the time is there and when it is appropriate, we make sure to take that time to ourselves.

One of the things that I find myself indulging in is just the “quiet time.” Sometimes that means something as simple as sitting on the front porch while Andrew gives the kids a bath and reading a book, eating a slice of EDWARDS® Key Lime Pie, kicking my feet up on the chair, and watching the world go by me. These are all things that I normally don’t get to do when the kids are around. Enjoy the quiet----there’s always noise coming from someone. Enjoy a nice dessert----there’s always someone trying to grab a bite, or two, or three. Enjoy a book--- there’s always someone that needs my eyes on them when we are outside.

Just knowing that I’m not responsible for anything in that moment but my happiness.

I think it is so important for mothers and fathers out there to indulge in themselves. Indulge in a good book. Indulge in a TV marathon. Indulge in an Edward’s Pie. And indulge in anything else that makes them feel good. We deserve it. We have the most important responsibility out there, and we deserve a little pat on the back here and there.

That, and a slice of heaven. Which is offered in the frozen section of Wal-Mart.

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