What I hope for...

I won't call them goals.
Or resolutions.
Or dreams.

They will be called...

Hope.

Things I hope for. What I hope for myself.
My family. My marriage. My daughter.
And my future.

Because in reality... you don't always get what you dream for.
Everything doesn't get checked off the to-do list.
And no one ever truly reaches perfection.

So hope it is.
I hope this will happen in 2012.
I hope that I will have the strength to work hard for my dreams.
And I hope to continue to grow in this role that I have created.
As a wife. And as a mother.

So what exactly do I hope for?

1. Health. Number one. As soon as a became a mother, I realized that I want to stick around this earth for as long as possible. I want to watch her grow. Watch her learn. Discover with her. Teach her. And create memories full of laughter, love, and joy. I hope that God will continue to provide good health to not only myself, but my daughter and husband. Those two are my world. They are a part of my heart and every piece of my soul. I would not, and could not, be who I am today without them.

Number one. I hope for health.

2. Guidance. I hope to start back into the church. I really struggle with this as I have made so many promises to myself that this is the year. And yet, I failed again. I hope that this won't be a repeat of the last. That I will get myself and my family back into a place that I feel like we belong. Somewhere that brings us even more closer together and closer to the One person that brought us together.

3. Patience. This seems like something I always hope for year after year, but never really put enough effort into. But I NEED to work on this. It's no longer a "if I have time" type deal. It is a must. I need to learn to be more patient with my husband and others that are a part of my life. I need to hope to find that inner strength to just let things go that are not so important in life.

I need this to be the year for patience. I hope this is the year.

4. Peace. I hope to find peace with the things that happen in life. To not get angry. Frustrated. Or ask the questions why? I hope to just appreciate what I do have and forget about what I don't have. I need peace this year. I need to be reminded that all things happen for a reason. 


Be at peace with that. I hope that I can do this.

5. Appreciate. I want to show my husband how much I love him. Really love him. How much I appreciate all that he does for me and for our daughter. How much I adore him. Admire him. And look up to him. Marriage is not a cake in the park. Not at all. But marriage is wonderful. Amazing. One of the most beautiful things in life {next to having children}... and I want to show my husband that. I hope to be the wife that I have always dreamt of being. I hope that this year I can do things with my husband. Learn to laugh with him like we are teenage kids. Find a hobby to do together. And really enjoy each other's company.

Above all else. Appreciate him as a husband.

6. Grow. This is huge for me. Every year I want to be better. Grow, not only as a wife, but now as a mother. I want to be the best mother out there. But I know that that isn't possible. So at the very least, I want to grow in my role as a mother. I want to do more with my daughter. I want to create activities that only her and I can do together. I want to teach her more. Show her the world more. Give her every taste, vision, and scent of the beautiful life around us. And I want to be a part of it. Every step of the way. I hope to sign up for swim classes with her. I want to take her to the zoo. I want to go outside with her every day. Make it a priority to teach her more Russian.

I hope I can continue to grow in this role that I have been blessed with.

7. Prioritize. This I have struggled with all year long. I hope to learn how to prioritize my time better. Be more effective with all the hours of the day that are given with me. Learn the balance between motherhood, marriage, career, and personal life. I need things to balance out. Less time spent on the social media aspect, and more time spent creating memories with my family. I know I already do this... but I need to work harder at this. Make it a priority. Make it number one always. So that erin condren life planner? The calendar on my fridge? All better go to good use.

I hope to learn how to balance all the important aspects of my life.

8. Acknowledge. Things that can no longer be ignored. Such as my teeth. This goes with number one. But I need to make it a priority as well. I hate the dentist. Cringe going to the dentist. Won't step foot into a dentists office. Until I absolutely need to. And this time around? I absolutely need to. I have a chipped molar from when I was pregnant with Elliana {thanks pregnanacy}, and I need to get that fixed soon. No ifs or buts.

No hope. This is a must.

9. Eat Right. This is very important to me. I feel like 2011 has been a huge year for my family and myself in this aspect. We have done really well with eating healthier, eating more organic and natural foods, and really watching what we put into our bodies. However, we are not perfect nor do we strive to be. I don't want to be perfect. I don't want to be organic 24/7. I don't want to be a "I can't eat that because it has this or that in it." I don't want nor do I need that.

However I do need to continue to learn more, read more, research as much as possible, and continue learning how to cook the healthiest meals possible for my family.

I was never a chef. Never stepped foot in the kitchen. And now? I cook 4-5 dinners a day, all lunches, and make breakfast for my daughter.

2011 was huge for me in the kitchen department. But I hope 2012 will be even bigger.

10. Expand. I hope that we will be blessed with another child in 2012. I have always wanted a bigger family and I believe that the Lord as a lot more planned for our future. I cannot wait to bring another bundle of joy into our family. I cannot wait for Elliana to have a brother or sister. Andrew to have another daughter or son. Me to be a mother to another child.

I hope for another gift of life.

So there you have it.
My condensed down version of my hopes for myself this year.

Overall, I just hope to continue to learn how to always strive to be a better wife for my husband and mother to my child/children. A petter person to strangers. A more loving daughter/sister to my family. A better friend, and a better Christian.

A healthy, happy, full of laughter and joy 2012.

Yes. That is what I hope for.