Friday, February 1, 2013

I Worry Less the Second Time Around

1. Monitoring how many diapers and how often he is eating. The first time around? I did the whole paper charting... for months. MONTHS! How long we breastfed. Which side. Poopy, wet, diapers. You name it, we did it. I even brought them to my doctor's appointments. Ha. Like he really wanted to see them? My chunker daughter was just that.. chunky. That was all the evidence my MD wanted.

So yes, this time around I downloaded a little fancy app, spent the 5 dollars, which then lasted only a few days before I threw that idea out the window.

2. Whether he is reaching all his milestones. I figure I will let my mama instinct take reigns on this one instead of what everyone says he should be doing. I trust I will remember when and what he should be doing at the appropriate times, and not to stress when it doesn't happen exactly when the experts say they should.

3. Sharing him with others. Share away.

4. Something happening to him. Of course as a mother, I will forever worry about my children. Probably more than a typical normal human being, as I have already insisted to Andrew a never-ending list of things our children are not allowed to do in fear of something happening to them. But what I mean here is that I won't fear of those scary things happening as a newborn. I won't fear something going wrong, me not doing the right thing, or him hurting. I just trust my mama instincts. Even more so than the first time around.

5. Crying. He is okay. If he cries for a minute, he will be okay. I don't worry about him hating me or not bonding with me because he cried. I know that things still need to get done, Elliana still needs my attention, meals need to be prepared, and I need to take care of myself. Now, of course, it never goes on longer than those couple of minutes, but still. I don't jump out of my skin at the very first sound of a whimper.

6. Co-sleeping. We do it. It works for us. For now. I don't worry like I did with Elliana at the beginning. Plus, I don't ever truly sleep. Ha. No really. When do I sleep?

7. Going out in public. Now... I still worry, however it's slightly different. With Elliana, the first month of her life we literally stayed in the house the whole time and only left for her doctor's appointments. Literally 30 days indoors. However this time around? I broke my rule. We have gone out in public places, but he has constantly stayed in his car seat {me never taking him out... he slept the whole time} and he was always covered up. Also? I carried the sanitizer around with me in my back pocket for both E and myself. We used it like crazy.

So, although there are many more things that are different this time around compared to the first, I wanted to focus mainly on this topic of "fear" and "worry." It stuck out to me the most.

Yes, I still worry. 
Yes, I will forever worry. 
Yes, I still take precautions.
I'll question myself at times.
I'll turn to Dr. Google every chance I get.
I'll do things I may have thought I never would.

But isn't that what motherhood is about anyway? Learning from experience. Never knowing what's to come. Fighting to be our very best for our children?

I think so. 

So yes, I worry less, but I've learned the power of even loving more.


  1. Wait until you have your third! My first did not have a sweet until she was three, my second one was about two and my baby ate an oreo cookie at about 11 months. It just gets easier.

    Enjoy those cute babies!

  2. He is so incredibly precious I can hardly stand it. And he looks like a dark-haired Elliana!

  3. Graham is so unbelievably cute. You can see so much of big sister in him.

  4. I'm due with our first baby in May! I'm going to try to remember these things so that I don't do them with my first!!! (: haha

  5. Oh that face! Love. How sweet. No wonder y'all are so in love!

  6. Graham looks so much like you in this picture! He is such a handsome little man!

  7. This makes me happy! I hope I worry less the second time around too. He's such a beautiful baby!

  8. I was fairly laid back with my son, I didn't chart eating/pooping either, my biggest fear was SIDS but we have the angel care monitor so that provided some comfort. I think if we have another I will try to take the same somewhat laid back approach.

  9. This is beautiful. You can tell how much you love your little ones :) shows how great of a mother you are to E when you can trust your "mommy instincts" with this new life.

    You're inspiring, girl!

  10. I heard from a lot of moms the second time around you get to truly enjoy your baby, and not worry so much. I did exactly as you did, track everything. Who is going to have time for that with baby #2? A co-worker told me Russian tradition is to not leave for 30 days, Indian is 60! YES, 60!! I went out here and there after 30 days, but Noah didn't leave the house (except doc appointments) for 60 days. I def won't be doing that the next time around. You can still take them out, and protect them. Seriously, Becky, reading your posts and watching your kids interact has totally brought on baby fever. Your blog and another one that I read just have me going crazy! hehe! But I'll wait. I need at least 2 years between the kiddos.

  11. I understand this!!! I have three boys now and every time I have a new baby I seem to worry less and less about certain I am due in spring with number 4. Things just get easier.

  12. So true. Our first was a preemie and we were not to take him out because it was Rsv season at the time he came home. Our daughter was full-term and at her big brother's bowling birthday party at 2 weeks old, his preschool valentines party at a 3 weeks old. Now I am due in about 3.5 weeks with our third and I have some onesies washed and just found the baby socks. No hospital bag packed, still looking for receiving blankets, car seat not in the car. It all works out though.

  13. This reminds me of a Luv's commercial I just saw on TV about first time and second time moms. One thing I know about the next time around is I WILL NOT let my husband change our second's diaper every time that stupid yellow line turns the slightest bit blue. I swear we used a box of diapers a day because of him. Also, I will not pack my entire house to take to the hospital. My poor husband looked like a pack mule leaving the hospital with about four bags filled with items I didn't use.

  14. Every one gets easier. I was at target with my 3 day old baby. Yes, I did it. But we needed milk and bread so what's a girl to do? Crying? Not this time. My nine year old drives me batty at the sound of his crying because I'm not fast enough at picking him up. I don't think the child's whimpered for more than 30 seconds!

  15. First of all, Graham is so adorable! What a sweetheart!
    Secondly, I read this post late at night last night while I was nursing our new little gal (she'll be two weeks on Monday) and the end just made me smile. I know that the Bible says not to worry, but that's hard to do as a mom. I'll wake up in the middle of the night and check to make sure she's breathing. I'll rush to google just to double check that something is normal. It's just all out of love. I think the only thing that keeps me from turning into a worrysome crazy pants is knowing that God is watching over her and he will protect her. I just have to do the best job I can do.

  16. I think you worry a little less after each baby. Graham is adorable & I also see his sister in him.

  17. This is so true! I agree so much with it. I'm finding I'm way more laid back with the twins than I ever was with Reagan.

  18. I love this post. I was the same way about all of the charting...oh, the charting. I used the Total Baby app, and we. tracked. EVERYTHING. This time, I plan to use it, but good gracious, NOT for diapers. Who does that!? Ha!

  19. I never rally sleep either. Co-sleeping isn't that big of a deal for me. Plus baby snuggles... so sweet!


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