Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Judgements.


Judgement. It's a serious issue. They {the judgements} are all around us. We see them more than we admit. And sometimes, we are guilty of it without us knowing. And sometimes, we do know it. Sometimes we ignore it. Sometimes we make it worse. The social media is a place full of judgements, and sometimes, if you just stop and take a look, you will catch yourself saying... this is not where I want to be.

That's why I find myself staying off any sort of social media for social purposes. I guess you could say blogging is the same way. Any which way you say something can somehow look like something else. And a picture. A picture can tell 5 different stories in 100 different ways.

You see....

If you say you had a drink, someone assumes that you have one every night, every day, and probably every hour of your life. You have a problem.

If you take a picture, you better double check it with a magnifying glass because someone might see your dirty mirrors, the toys scattered everywhere, or the toddler with no pants on. And then they know exactly the life that you live.

If you post a picture at the gym every day, people assume you don't want to spend time with your children. Forget the fact that you have turned to live a healthy lifestyle and make a change for the better. People forget that part. They instantly want to attack instead.

And if you post a picture in the car , you better mention that you aren't actually driving when you took the picture. Because everyone assumes that you are, in fact, driving. Because you are that irresponsible. Caption it. Now.

Not to mention, if you don't have your kid strapped in that car seat PERFECTLY, you better be on pins and needles for the first comment to point out your parenting screw up.


If you talk about happy things you are considered fake. If you post about unhappy things, you are a "complainer."


And it seems that these days you have to use parenthesis and by the ways and don't judge me phrases anytime you post a picture or talk about something on your heart because no matter how you say things or how many times you explain yourself, people out there will just not get you.

But you know what I want to tell you about this? They probably didn't "get you" from the minute they opened up your page, your picture, or anything else that involved you and your life. They probably didn't "get you" nor wanted to "get you." They probably didn't like you for not what you said, but maybe what you didn't say.

What I have to say? Don't let it get you. Move on.

You see, because social media, it really can be a whole bunch of negative. It's really just a fancy way of reliving high school all over again. The great part about it though? YOU CAN CHOOSE TO WALK AWAY.

One comment will be made. More will come out. People then start to battle one another, and the next thing you know one picture or a viewpoint is blown into something bigger than it needs to be. And jugements. Oh boy are those out there. More than ever before.

So this got me thinking. How sad is that? That people have to sit there and explain themselves to the world. That someone cannot see beyond one picture you post, just one second of your life, and automatically assume they have a grasp on who you are as a human being.

It's sad, and I wish it wasn't true. But it's out there. In all forms. Specifically the ugly one.

There are perks of social media, I get that. It's a great way for people to stay updated. Great way to find out what's going on in the world {hello, I never get to catch up on news on TV}, and learn from one another. It has it's benefits. But those benefits? Have a lot of catching up to do compared to the flaws and hatred all around us.

Who cares what Sally did. What Betty didn't do. And what Eve said. Who cares.

Don't look at a picture and assume you know everything. Don't look at a mom and predict what she is or isn't doing with her children. Just don't.

Do look at yourself and see how you can help someone else. How you can make a positive change in the world. And how you could be a great role model for your children.

All that effort to worry about what someone else is doing or saying won't bring any good to your or those around you.

Being positive and encouraging?
That will.

22 comments:

  1. Well said! Great post today. :)

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  2. Great post! I have made it a habit to try hard not to make judgmental comments on others social media. I enjoy having Social media outlets like twitter and Instagram because like you said it's a great way to stay updated, but I think it's really important for us to try to focus on the positives of what others choose to share with us instead of judging.

    Xoxo
    Petchie
    http://psblogbook.blogspot.com

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  3. Absolutely love this. <3 Awesome post girl.

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  4. I'm a firm believer that people who are so quick to judge others seriously lack in the self confidence department. We're all guilty to a degree, I know this, but some take it to an extreme. So sad, really. Great post!

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  5. I 100% agree with everything you said, I too have been staying away from social media for these reasons.

    Lizzie
    www.multipurposemama.com

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  6. Amen, sister! I'm not totally innocent of judging others too quickly. I don't think any of us are. But, since having my first baby, I have really put a focus on NOT judging others. That is not something I want to teach my little girl. Thanks for the post!!

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  7. So true, girl! I can't tell you how many times I've considered delteing my facebook account because of judgmental people. Even worse, extended family members.

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  8. Great post becky. I agree 100% with everything you said.

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  9. Perfect words, truly! I have seen so many people being negative, rude, and dramatic lately on social media and it's driving me crazy. THANK YOU for posting this!

    M

    abrinkadventure.blogspot.com

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  10. Absolutely LOVED this post! We are ALL guilty of judgement and I think your post really makes us a bit more aware of the thoughts and actions we take toward ourselves and others!

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  11. totally agree! this is the exact reason why I choose the people who can view my pictures, tweets, etc. it's ridiculous!

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  12. I really needed to read this this morning. Sometimes my feelings are so hurt by things I read from people who pick apart my blog or posts. It can really be so defeating and make you question everything you write. I try to look at it and say "I had 40 positive comments and 2 negative", but it's those negative ones that continue to bother me. I don't mind constructive criticism or different viewpoints...it is the mean or judgmental ones that I cannot stand. I loved this post (:

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  13. Yes yes yes. This is a great post! Thank you for writing it!

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  14. Such a fine line, this social media/blogging stuff! I think about this all the time too! One day I posted a picture of me and KP and someone said "you are such a fun mom!" but what she doesn't know is all the coaxing and bribing and whatnot that went into that "fun" we were doing. Pictures, posts, comments, they are just a teenie tiny glimpse. I wish more people got that.

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  15. This is why I quit Facebook and haven't missed it a bit. It was just a whole bunch of negativity, mostly from family members that I could not "unfriend."

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  16. Love it! It's something that we all need to work on.

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  17. This post really made me think! Thank you for that. :)

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  18. I feel exactly the same way! :) Great post!

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  19. Just found your blog and love this post! So true. Especially now that I'm a mom, I wait for the "mom blog haters" to come out of the woodwork! Thanks for sharing!

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