Monday, September 23, 2013

A letter to my 16 year old self

Dear Becky,

Happy birthday. Today you turn 16. It's a wonderful age, I'm sure. That's what you're thinking anyway. Now you get to drive your own car, by yourself. You get an extended curfew, what 10 now? Maybe 9? And you are just a couple years away from being called an adult. I know you may think that you are old and big and mature now. Trust me when I say this... you are not.

You will make some foolish decisions in the next few years, think you are living the life, and be clueless about everything else and everyone else around you. And I'm here to tell you all about it.

You know what you will also do? Make some really really good decisions. Like meeting your now to be handsome, amazing husband. Oh yes, that I will save for later on in the story. For now let me tell you what the next 10 years will look like for you.

First, you'll spend a lot of time with your core group of girlfriends. There are, what, 5 of you? Yes. They are your best friends. Your life. You just cannot imagine parting ways with them. I'll tell you something though, 10 years from now? You'll barely know them. One, you will continue to work with. Another will move to another country. And the other two? Different states. You'll keep in contact shortly after you graduate college, but then your life gets a little busy, their life gets a little busy, and those friends you begin to lose contact with. Slowly, but surely. You'll have days where you miss them. You'll have days where you cry thinking about the one in the other country and how much you miss her. And you'll even have a day where one of those friends? Completely cuts all ties with you. And yes, it will hurt. And yes, you will be shocked. But just understand that not all relationships are meant to last forever. That sometimes? They come in and out of your lives for a reason.

You'll go to college and you'll swear that your intent is to go to medical school. That nursing school is there for just a degree and for you to get through the four years. Except, you'll have a little too much fun your first semester. You'll sit at the computer and "aim" with every new college student that you have encountered with, and you'll be busy writing down in your calendar each and every new frat party to attend during the week. Every day of the week. And when you are thinking of actually doing something else besides that? Well then, you'll be too busy sleeping rather than going to class. You're a smart kid you say to yourself. You graduated high school with a 3.875, and you don't need class to teach you anything. You'll ace those tests and that will be that. Except, you forget to study for those tests. And ace them? Ha, that you won't do. You'll come home with a gpa of 1.75 and swear that nursing school is just too boring for you. Good thing for that counselor that talked you out of quitting when you marched in that office with a new game plan.

No worries, you wised up and ended up making up for those terrible grades, finished on time, and graduated with a 3.4 cumulative GPA. But class? Boy, you still missed that more often than you should have.

So that second semester? That second semester you room with a new girl {long story, your roommate will date a psycho who ends up stalking you... police involved and all}, and end up meeting the love of your life, husband to be. You two end up being inseparable, and literally spend every day together. You'll quit your sorority a week before you were supposed to move in, and get an apartment, where just a couple months later you end up purchasing a dog. A dog that you swear is your baby, that you miss after only being a few hours apart {during those classes that you should have attended more often than not}, and one that will later be replaced by babies.

Oh yes, that's right, you will have babies. Lets fast forward. We know you graduate. You get a job. Oh yes, you get engaged to that prince charming the last semester of college and after planning a big grand wedding, you decide to throw all those plans out the window and book a wedding package in Maui. For two. Leave it to you to not follow the rules and do things your way.

You get married. You get a big girl job. You put an offer in on a house in Cincinnati {where your husband attends grad school}, and then end up backing out {good thing}, and moving back in with your parents to continue the house search. You later find out your are pregnant, which speeds up said house search, and in no time you two buy the house that you swore would be the one during an online search. You were right.

And in those next couple of years not only do you bring your first daughter home, but you also bring home your first son. You create many memories together, as a family of three, and later a family of four. You soon realize how important life is. How important parenting is. How important raising these little babies is. The right way. To lead them down the healthy route, so that one day they can be contributing, successful, members of society. And success? Success being measured through happiness. You will want nothing else in this world but true happiness for these babies. And from the day they are born? You'll fight for that happiness.

16 year old Becky, you have a lot of wonderful things ahead. I'm not sure where the story goes after the first couple years of having babies, but I can tell you that you have an amazing husband and two blessings that need you in their life. Be safe, be strong, be independent and wild {er, maybe not wild}, but always remember that there are good things ahead. That even if you may not know it, even if you may not see it, there is a plan for you.

And that plan looks beautiful.

Now, stop daydreaming about boys, quit with the parties, and go to class why don't you. And don't forget to wear a seat belt. Yes, it's made to save lives. Use it.

Love always,
Your 27 year old version of you. The much smarter and wiser one.

Complete list of topics here
Next week: How my childhood impacted who I am today

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