Leaving a child in the car.

Post written in June 2012.

 

Never fails, every summer, you hear about a poor innocent child being left in the car. Every summer, a mother or father "forgets." Every summer, a parent claims "I thought they'd be okay." Every summer, these people get arrested, plea to the judge, and then receive their child back.

And sometimes? That child is no longer alive to get back. And often times? Those people serve no time. Their only punishment? Knowing their child suffered because of them. Although that right there would be the worst life sentence of all.

So how does it happen? How do parents just forget. You see, I'm not saying it doesn't exist. That these parents didn't just make a terrible mistake and something in their brain was off that day. I'm just trying to understand it so that maybe we can prevent it from happening in the future. I have watched two live court cases on TV, and watched it from beginning to end. I watched one father who was being charged after the death of his 5 month old that he had forgotten was in the car. That man... I tell you what... cried like I've never seen a man cry. Through the whole case. And it wasn't the I'm-scared-to-go-to-jail-tears, it was the genuine I-just-lost-my-child-and-it-was-my-fault-tears. Honestly, I know he was a good father. I know it was just a really unfortunate situation. Surprisingly? He got 20 years. Yes. Even I? Was shocked. Because shortly before that? I saw a mother, no emotion what-so-ever walk free from the same exact situation.

Is it a mother versus father thing? Not sure. But I believe that if we are going to throw around this forget theory... then who is to say that one forgot more than the other? Both were equally as guilty no? But then again both did in fact get the same life sentence. That being without their child. And like I said before, that's the worst punishment of all.

At the end of the day though, I do believe that there are those who truly just make a mistake. Do I understand it? No. Doesn't mean that it doesn't happen. Just means I can't wrap my head around it. And that's okay, because I don't have to understand it to realize that there is a dangerous trend here summer after summer.

You see, I can go on for hours about how mind boggling all this can be. I can't tell you I understand one bit of it, because I've never been there. And so, I can't say what those people were going through or what happened that day. I do know this though, there is a worse scenario out there. And that being?

The mother {or father} who purposefully leaves her child in her car. I repeat. On purpose. You see, this whole post was evoked when I had read a story of a lady {in my town} who left her 11 month old in the car, when it was 100 degrees out. She... hold on to your seats... rolled down the windows... and then? Proceeded to go shopping.

I imagine that a shopper walked by, heard the child crying, and then called the police. When the police arrested her, she just claimed that she thought the child would be "okay." O-K-A-Y. Please. Tell me how anything about leaving a child strapped into a car in 100 degree weather {120 in the actual car} makes it OKAY. Let me answer that for you. Nothing.

20 minutes prior? She did the same thing at another store. A woman called the cops. But as she is on the phone with the cops, the woman approaches her car and drives away. Do the police proceed? No. Because? "No harm was done." Except. Harm was done. Because she went to the next door to do the exact same thing. Lucky that there are witnesses to catch her each and every time... but that isn't always the case. So why let her go?

She's not the only one. Another woman left her daughter with the car running. Okay. So great, we are providing air. But what about someone kidnapping your child? Do we not care about that?

Another said she just wanted to go to the job fair. Another thought it wasn't too warm in the car. Another this. Another that. There are always excuses.

Yet it happens. Year after year. Summer after summer. What do we do to stop this? Why is this happening so often? What, as a society, are we doing wrong?

I don't have those answers, and unfortunately, I don't have the power to get into the minds of these people, to prevent all this from happening, to get the child in the car.

These children are literally strapped into a death zone. And it's preventable. Do we design cars differently? Do we make stricter laws? Do we broadcast these stories through all social media outlets to reach as many people as possible?

It's not the people who forget about their child and have to live with the worst pain and memory for the rest of their lives. It's these people who purposefully neglect their child. And? They are the ones that get a slap on the wrist.  But both scenarios are scary. Both scenarios involve an innocent child fighting for their life. Thus, something needs to be done.

Something. Anything. If anything... just talking about it. Making it known. Passing the stories to our neighbors. Speaking out about it. For these children.