Monday, August 13, 2012

So what are you hoping for?

8.13.12 

Oh the beloved controversial question that gets pregnant mamas out there all sorts fired up. A topic that no one every wants to publicly discuss. In fear of judgement. Fear of the remarks, the views, the opinions. Oh those harsh judgmental opinions. You see people ask the question... but rarely do they expect you to actually answer it honestly. What they expect you to say is, "a healthy baby."

Because how often do you hear about the mama who screams at the top of her lungs that she wants a boy boy boy. Or she's dreaming of all things girl. Oh no, those kind of thoughts absolutely do not exist.  Yet they do, trust me.

Back to the question. Forget already? What are you hoping for? 

Ah yes. That question. So now that I am very much showing, this is a topic that gets discussed on a daily basis. Just about. Family. Co-workers. The cashier at the grocery store. Everyone wants to know what you are hoping for. Especially if this is the second child. Especially when they see a blonde haired little princess at my side. "A girl. You must want a boy next."

You would think this would bother me? But it doesn't. You see... no one means any harm by these comments. They aren't saying that by you wanting one sex over the other that you will hate your child if they turn out the opposite. That if you want to have a boy, and turns out its a girl, then you are going to love that child any less. No. Absolutely not.

In fact, I'm going to say that is is perfectly normal. Whether you even realize it or not.

You see, this pregnancy I've been asked that question even more than the last. People are curious little bodies, you know it. And every time, I have answered around the lines of... "You know... I'd be really happy for both." And the truth of the matter? I would. I will.

Because the truth is.... I would love for Elliana to have a sister. I want her to grow up with someone that can be her best friend as they grow old together. And at the same time... how amazing it would be to have a boy. I want a boy sometime. Whether it is now or the next one. I just can't see my life without having a son.

And then there's this gut feeling. I had it with Elliana from the moment I saw that positive sign on the pee stick. I just knew. It was a girl. And so? My heart was set. I wanted a girl and I wanted it bad. So the day that I found out? Was a sigh of relief and confirmation.

This time? I didn't have a gut feeling until about the 3rd month. And all of a sudden... I just knew it was a boy. And so today is the day. The day... And I think... would I be disappointed if it turns out to be a girl?

Of course not! I'll be over the moon. Maybe because it's my second and I already have my girl. Maybe its because I already know the blessing a child brings into the home, and that the gender absolutely does not matter.

Either way? I think it's a boy. And if I'm wrong? I'll be happy. And if I'm right? I'll be happy.

Today.... I'll be happy.

Any last minute guess? Send them my way!

36 comments:

  1. My guess is a boy!
    It is crazy, tho - the moment we find out what we are having - no matter what we "wanted" - we are so totally in love with that baby boy or girl - it just doesn't matter.

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  2. I do hate it that we are expected to just want a healthy baby. With my second I wanted a girl so bad. I bawled like a baby when we found out it was another boy. But the moment I held Logan for the first time, I knew God had given me exactly what I needed.

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  3. The ancitipation is KILLING me! Can't wait to find out!

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  4. I'm thinking Girl. :)

    I am so glad you posted this. So many people, (including myself) are afraid to post things like this in fear of judgement. But it needed to be done. I have three boys and a girl. And when I was pregnant with my 4th, I wanted a girl so bad. I cried and cried before I knew what I was having that I would probably never get a girl. Cause I knew my husband said no more after four. It was silly but sometimes it happens and it's perfectly natural. And at the end of the day you still love that child regardless. :)

    Can't wait to hear what you are having!!!

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  5. I hope you don't keep us waiting too long!!! :) We're all very excited for you today! :)

    I'm pregnant with our first and I thought for sure I was having a girl. And I told EVERYBODY! :)

    But when I saw the ultrasound was a boy, and that my hubs started to cry, I was blown away with love for this little man :)

    I know either way you'll be happy. I just can't wait to hear!! :)

    Have a great day, love!

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  6. Love this!! I feel the exact same way! I want Emerson to have a sister but I also really want to have a boy too. But like you said, it will be amazing either way! I'm guessing girl for you. Are you going to be announcing here or do we have to wait?

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  7. Well my fried ...first off I hope you have another girl ....simply because I never had a sister and whevener I see little girls i always hope they have a sister ...you know that eternal best friend you get to grow up with ......

    that being said ...boys are just amazing little things too!

    Just like you ,,,,,I just KNEW #1 was a girl .....and it was. But the 2nd time around I prayed and prayed for another girl so that Sofia could have a sister .......but I had no feelings of what i was having ....then all of the sudden I knew it was a boy......and when i found out it was a boy ....i cried...but not tears of happiness (dont judge me people) but tears of sadness ....because I wondered.....would we have more after this was this it for us. I knew I loved him but I wondered f Sofias little sister would come along eventually ............but my son is the most precious little mamas boy but also super tough. Whatever you have will be 1 more amazing little person for you to be a mama too!

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  8. Looking forward to finding out the sex of your baby. I love the point you made - if you have two girls, they will have a different kind of a bond than if you have a boy and a girl. That's a great way to look at it, especially for parents out there who only want two, and they have two boys or two girls. Keep us updated, I'm loving all your content and your new layout changes!

    http://www.chezglaser.com

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  9. Ahhh the anticipation is killing me!!! Have fun today and get lots of pictures!! : )

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  10. BEST post ever! You are so right, everyoneee wants to know "what your having" or "whats their name" people are absolutely curious little buggers, I vote boy :) goodluck lady cant wait for the post!

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  11. Whatever it is, that baby will be perfect!! <3

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  12. Having suffered a loss and struggled 3+ years to have a child, I honestly would have been elated either way...just wanted a healthy babe...BUT, when they told me it was a girl (I was convinced Boy, btw)I was over the moon and giddy with excitement. Just like you (if we are blessed to have another) I would love a sister so Elena could have a bestie, but would so love to have a little snuggly mama's boy :)

    It's a win-win either way :) I'll be stalking all forms of social media waiting for the announcement!

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  13. With Baby #2 for me, I got the "I bet you want a boy, right?" ALL THE TIME. I didn't care either way because the Hubs and I knew it wouldn't influence our desire to have more children. They'd say "Then you'd have 1 of each and could be done!" Um, what if I didn't want to "be done"?? But I felt like it was a boy, and...it was. So for you? I'm thinking BOY! Can't wait to hear what you find out today!

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  14. EEEE!!! I CANNOT WAIT to find out what you're having momma!!!!!!! :-)

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  15. My guess is a girl! Good luck! Can't wait to find out boy or girl!!

    :)

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  16. Cant wait to read!! Hope its a boy!!! or girl whatever makes you all happy!!!!

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  17. When I was pregnant with my little guy I had wanted a girl so bad, and the Dr said he was 80% sure the baby was a girl and I took that as I was having a girl. I was so excited! Then at the next ultrasound I found out I was for sure having a BOY. I was so upset, but now I look back and laugh. I couldn't imagine having a girl, I love my little boy more than I thought ever possible :D

    You should totally swing by and check out my giveaway:
    http://walifeandlemons.blogspot.com/2012/08/monday-miscellany-giveaway.html

    xoxo

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  18. This is our first, and I wanted a girl SO MUCH. I'm thrilled that it *IS* a girl. We definitely want to have another kiddo and I honestly don't care if it's a boy or a girl, so I know what you mean. I did have one person ask me if I was "happy" that our baby is a girl, in a very condescending way. I couldn't believe her!

    Can't wait to find out!

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  19. Pretty sure my original guess was boy so I'm sticking with it! Good luck with your ultrasound! Excited for the gender news!!!

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  20. Cant wait to find out. I am glad you posted this!!!

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  21. Can't wait to find out what you are having! I am guessing boy, but E having a little sister would be awesome too.

    I felt the same way you did except I thought this second one was going to be a girl for sure. Since they are going to be so close in age I would have loved for Kyla to have a sister to grow up with. But we're having a boy, which is great because we've always wanted both. And Daddy is really excited to have a son. So I totally get it. Never fails that people don't believe you though.

    Good luck and hopefully baby will cooperate today :)

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  22. Can't wait to hear! I think it's a girl!

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  23. I'm guessing a girl! Can't wait to find out!! :-)

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  24. You MUST post as soon as you find out. Dying of anticipation over here!!:)

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  25. Love this post friend! I have one very similar that I just wrote on our adoption and gender preference! I agree...a child is a blessing...gender is irrelevant! Good luck today and I can not wait to hear if Elli will have a sister or a brother. I actually think it's a girl. :)

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  26. I am so excited for you!!! I hope your little baby is growing healthy!! and you say it right when you say either way would be happy as long as they are healthy and have all little fingers and toes. Can't wait to find out!!!!

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  27. Did you already announce it?! This made me tear up. I am so excited for you!!

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  28. This is a great post and I think everyone feels that way. For after having 2 girls I was hoping this time around for a boy but I was blessed with another little girl and I'm ok with that.

    I can't wait to hear what your having! I'm gonna guess GIRL!!!!!

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  29. I like your approach to this question, I hope you have a healthy baby whether the sex be a male or female. I'm sure they'll be cute!

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  30. Ohhh, I can not wait to hear if little teddy graham is a girl or a boy!!!

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  31. Yay! Sending happy thoughts your way! Can't wait to hear the outcome!!

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  32. I am so excited to hear the gender and I feel EXACTLY the same way. A boy would be great so there is one of each but I would love for my Eva to be able to have a sister.

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  33. Happy your posted this. What to know the honest truth? I wanted a girl so badly, but I had two boys first. I was SO worried about the gender of baby #3 and the pressure from people? Crazy. My mom was dying for a grand-daughter and I was dying for a daughter! 10 months ago, she arrived in our lives :) I feel so fulfilled and complete. I LOVE my boys and can't imagine life without them, but I needed a daughter in the picture somewhere too.

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  34. I am probably the lone person out here because I really DO just want a healthy baby! Haha!! But after a miscarriage, that's all I can think about. I will be SO SO happy with either, but I just want healthy!!

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  35. I always answered the question honestly but people were not always nice about. "I've never heard someone give an actual answer before, only 'a healthy baby'." Was a comment I got frequently after I said I'd love a girl. Well why did you ask lady? haha

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