Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Deleting Social Media, One Click at a Time.

 ***For some reason, blogger posted last week and dated it a month ago, and was up for a couple hours. If you read this already, sorry. If you haven't... here it is. I wrote a pre-post yesterday to address some issues in this post.

I wrote this post months ago, and I simply talk about all the different social media outlets that I have started eliminating out of my life.

First, let's talk about the social media that started it all.


It was about a couple years ago that I "deleted" Facebook from my life. The reason I put that in quotes is because I did not technically delete it. At first, it started out with me going through my 1,000+ friend list {because you know, we weren't friends unless we were Facebook official, ahem} and spent hours going one by one and deleting people that I no longer associated myself with. Ones that I know could care less to see images of my family, and vice versa, I could care less to see bar-hopping scenes every weekend.

And then as time went on, I noticed that I didn't have the desire or need for Facebook like I had before becoming a mom. Days would go by. Sometimes weeks. I'd login here and there, but within 5 minutes, I'd be off. I toyed around the idea of deleting my name completely, but then I realized that I didn't want to delete it permanently in case I wanted to stay in touch with someone. I liked knowing that I still had access to the more important people in my life and that it was a way for me to share and send a message to some friends or family that were out of state.

Everything else that Facebook was all about? Engaging in mindless political conversations? Status updates? Wall posts? Just fell short of productive and meaningful.

Which brings me to twitter. Unnecessary status updates.

You see, at the time that I had "deleted" Facebook from my life, I had then discovered twitter. Ironic, I know. No, I was not living in a bubble and did not know what twitter was. I had heard about it plenty of times but never saw it as appealing to me. That is until I was almost a year into blogging and realized that in order to stay connected then I needed to open up {or actually use} this twitter thing.

And I did. And I loved it. And just with any other social media out there, the first time you use it... you seem to use it too much.

I went to the store.
Good morning guys, I'm awake!
Now we are eating.
Time for bed... tootles!

Cringe. I know. That was me. I felt like I was sharing every bit of everything that I was doing as if anyone out there truly cared. They didn't.

And then I would find myself obsessed with what other people would say. I would want to jump into a conversation {that did not need me jumping into}. I would want to get defensive about something {that did not need me getting defensive over}. I would make judgements and eye rolls {that I was wrong to do so}. And although it took me a little longer to realize it, about a year ago, I finally did. I realized how unhealthy twitter truly was.


Again, not in the literal term. But gone. Gone were my habits of checking twitter when I woke up. Then every hour. Then before bed. Gone was my obsession of scrolling through my feed and not missing a single update by some of my "favorite" girls. Gone.

Yes, I still have twitter {just like I still have Facebook}, but both are used primarily for either blogging purposes, to answer someone's question, ask a question, or to engage once in a while with someone that I wanted to catch up with, congratulate, or ask a question.

And now, we have instagram. Instagram is much newer than the other two and something that I did truly enjoy for a long time. I think the idea behind instagram is great, and it's something that I have actually thought about a lot. I thought about how much my family {and friends} enjoy seeing pictures of my little ones. It's their way of watching them grow, and I loved that I did not have to send an individual text to every person I knew. I loved that it made them happy to see a new pictures. And I loved even more that I had a place to go to and look back on to see how fast these babies of ours grow.

I also at the time enjoyed looking at other people's pictures and would find myself wanting to click on a person's name and go through all their previous pictures that I may have missed.

I love pictures period. I love photography. I love how you can capture beauty and make time stand still. And I love that you only get a second, split second, of a person's day and all you have left is your imagination. To imagine what they are like. What their kids are like. How they spend their day. And the type of people that they are.

A glimpse into someone's life.

But then at the same time, it's a glimpse into my life as well. More importantly, my children's lives. And as Elliana is nearing 3 {this November, where has the time gone}, I have found myself asking myself a few questions.

When will I shut it down {instagram}, and when will I hold back {from sharing}.

When you begin to ask yourself these sort of questions, that's when you find yourself saying... it's time. So slowly, I began posting less. I did not find the desire to look at other's pictures anymore. I did not find the desire for sharing everything that we were doing. And I just did... not have the desire.

But I was stuck. My MIL would call and ask "why are there no instagram pictures!" And so I would post a few more that day. I knew she loved them, just as I knew that my friend's and other family members loved them. And I loved sharing with them also. I just no longer wanted to share with everyone else...

So I made a compromise. I made a second username and I started friending just those that know us. And now I share a lot. And I give them more glimpses then ever before. And that's okay.

Will I delete Instagram? Probably not. Not yet at least. But I just won't be there very often. And when my daughter turns 3, there probably will no longer be any images of her. Because I know as she gets older, she may not want every picture of her out there. And that's okay. I respect that and I want some of those intimate details to be shared with just those that personally know us.

I know the last question that you may be asking yourself {of me} is where does blogging come into this conversation. It's a great question and I've thought about it often. Blogging is a whole different ballgame for me. Blogging is not a social media for me as much as it is an outlet. For me to write my thoughts make them public. The social part of blogging? Visiting other blogs, connecting with other bloggers, and spending time getting to catch up on other people's lives? That's pretty much 95% gone. It has been for a while. Simply because time does not allow for me to participate in this are that I once enjoyed.

But writing? Going private and shutting down? No intention. It's something that I am passionate about and more importantly something that is important to me.

It's my selfish outlet and I want to hold onto it forever.

Will my blog always be public?
Probably not.
Will I still write?


  1. I've been having similar thoughts on social media lately. I still do instagram and read blogs I absolutely love (like yours!), but I've realized that it's such a waste of time that could be used spending time with my baby and husband, checking something off my very long to do list, working a little more, going to the gym, reading a parenting book, etc. All of these things will have more of a positive impact on my life and my family than mindlessly scrolling through FB multiple times a day. I don't know why anyone would take offense to what you had to say here. All good points!

  2. Great post! I think as bloggers sometimes we all do spend too much time on the computer. I know I am guilty sometimes! I have many, many reservations about putting my daughter's images on my blog. My husband barely allows them on Facebook but he has agreed to them on my blog. I watermark over her face but that still bothers me. I can see how one day you may want to go private. You do have an awesome blog though! And yes if I wasn't on the computer, my phone or my ipad, I could actually finish my books that I want to read!

  3. I never was able to get into Twitter. It just doesn't appeal to me. Although I do LOVE Instagram, I find myself mostly posting and not really spending a whole time going through other people's pictures - unless they're a close friend. And even then, I do it when the boys (Boyfriend included) are asleep and I'm up alone.

  4. I commend you for being able to shut off social media. The only one of those three that I do is Facebook. It makes me feel connected to the outside world as I am a SAHM in a very rural area. I like checking in with my friends, catching up on their lives. The key for me is I regulate it- only going on the computer at certain times of day (like right now, kids are in bed). Not having a smart phone makes this even easier to regulate. I don't think I would want to be connected 24/7.

  5. I truly do enjoy your blog and only wish I had found it sooner. You have so much to say and like I've mentioned before I feel like I can relate to you in some ways. Possible being from a different culture or my appreciation for my mother wanting a better life for us. Either way you have lots to say and will be sad to see you go. Nonetheless I respect that and agree with giving our children the privacy they should have.


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